Anyone who knows me knows that I come ALIVE in the fall. October through December is the most magical and perfect time to me. I love the change in the air, the myriad of holidays, and everything just seems prettier when it’s decorated.
I don’t know why, but the whole world just seems more beautiful and it feels like a fresh start. Maybe it’s because school begins again and everyone falls back into routine, but for whatever reason- I love the blank slate that is autumn. To me, fall is more than pumpkin spice and fuzzy socks/boots season. It’s the ending of summer, but the beginning of something new.
I’ve been thinking a lot recently about things that I need to improve upon in life- less procrastination, drinking more water, etc. But, this morning it really hit me how I’ve been hanging on to some hard feelings that are doing nothing but weighing me down.
2018 was a very difficult year for me. I lost some friendships, experienced a broken engagement, and saw some longterm goals/dreams not come to fruition. To say the least, it was very draining emotionally and I suppose I felt the only way to combat the frustration of these disappointments was to blame and harbor resentment towards other people.
Obviously, harboring resentment really does not do anyone any good. It did not change any part of my life except for make me feel more miserable and even more drained by holding onto that hurt.
The beautiful thing about fall is that even nature lets things go. I know it’s super cliche and an overdone analogy, but I guess I just never really thought about it and looked at it through the lens of my life. I can’t move on to new seasons without letting go of past disappointments. Trees can’t bloom in the spring if they don’t let go of what they already have hanging on. I can’t move to new seasons if I continually live in the past thinking somehow that will change what has already happened.
So, I did an inventory of my heart and the many feelings I have and realized burning bridges does not get you anywhere. Obviously, you should never shy away from removing toxic people from your life, but that’s not what I’m speaking to. I’m talking about people who have talked behind your back or hurt your feelings with certain actions. You don’t necessarily have to be friends with them, but being angry over something that happened a year ago does not really do any good. It’s only hurts you.
After realizing this, I sent a few texts and tried to make things right. I may never see these people again or have a friendship with them, but I know that I’ve let the resentment go because I want to enjoy this new season that I am in. I know I won’t be able to fully do that until I’ve let go of what happened in an old season.
So, I say all this to say- whatever you are holding on to, it’s time to let go. Make the phone call, send the text, mend what’s broken and move on. God has something new for you and it’s time to let go of the old and make room for the new. Happy Fall ❤
“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. I am doing a new thing!” -Isaiah 43:18-19
Bailey Kennon 